queen of babble: Kimi Matias Raikkonen, I miss you.

I've watched Formula 1 since I was a little girl, when I didn't really understand what I was seeing, the cars just looked cool zooming around and overtaking each other.

Michael Schumacher was a household name in my household. But I didn't start watching it religiously, on my own, until around 2006 or 2007.

I began watching every single race, memorizing all the events from each one, I couldn't miss even 1 race (even if it was at 2 am and the next day was a school day) and I looked forward to it every other weekend. My ritual was pizza and F1, while sms-ing/chatting with Ya Wen, my partner in F1 crime.

I was (am?) a steadfast Ferrari and Kimi Raikkonen supporter.

This year, I'm not excited about any Formula 1 races at all. Period. It's like my love for Formula 1 left with Kimi Raikkonen at the end of last year :( And I'm STILL NOT OVER IT!!!

Bloody hell, I cry every time I watch F1 now. Why?

Beause when I see 2 red Ferrari cars coming down the circuit, I expect to see Kimi's red and white helmet in one of the cockpits. And it isn't.

I miss seeing the number 1 on the front of Kimi's car.

I miss him and Massa being teammates.

Jean Todt (center) looks so happy and about to cry, like a proud papa at his sons' graduation. He's another one I miss too.

I miss seeing him in the red Ferrari suit.

I miss him winning with Ferrari.

I've never seen him smile this big before :D

Sebastien Loeb: "Come to Rally man. It's great here! No shitty politics like in F1. My trophy even looks like a fancy chio goblet!" F U! _|_

I miss his cryptic interviews in his terrible slurry monotone Kim-lish at post-race press conferences.

I miss seeing him guzzling champagne on the podium instead of spraying it like everyone else does.

I expect to see his name on the timesheets, "K Raikkonen". I expect to hear about him making fastest laps in every race. I expect him to BE THERE. I miss him being the F1 driver I've known and loved for years. It's just all very heartbreaking, and I'm having a hard time accepting it, even after 5 months.

Well, it isn't true that I watched Formula 1 just for Kimi, or I liked F1 just because I like Kimi. I truly do (did?) love it. But! I loved the F1 of the past. The structure of the teams, and the drivers, the tight Ferrari-McLaren competition, the familiarity of it all...

Everything has changed this year. I don't deal very well with change. It takes me a long time to accept things, and adjust to them.

But I guess Kimi is happy where he is now, in the World Rally Championship. He may not be great at it, like he is at F1, but he likes it. Since they don't show Rally on any of the Astro sports channel (as far as I know), I went on the WRC website to look for videos (smart hor? :D)

With his co-driver Kaj Lindstrom. Imagine that, Iceman's got a co-driver now!

Arctic Rally in Sweden. It's so bizarre to see his name on the side of that car.

Rally is some fucking scary shit I tell you!!! Go see for yourself if you don't believe me. Rally Sweden 2010. Rally Mexico 2010.

In the 2nd rally of the season in Mexico, Kimi had an accident and rolled his car off the road. So scary :( I don't understand Finnish so it just sounded like Kimi's co-driver was praying for his dear life the entire time, LOL!!

It's so heart-pounding cause it looks like Kimi's just flying blindly around terrifying corners! But there's no one to overtake T_T It's really nothing like F1 at all. It's gonna take me some time to learn all the technical aspects of Rally, like how I know everything about F1 all the way inside and out.